


How Can I Put It Down Into Words?

by RoseCriss



Category: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them (Movies), Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Hogwarts, M/M, Mirror of Erised
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-22
Updated: 2019-03-22
Packaged: 2019-11-28 02:40:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 752
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18202400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RoseCriss/pseuds/RoseCriss
Summary: An introspective Albus Dumbledore drags himself away from the Mirror of Erised to find a mysterious envelope and vial in his chambers...





	How Can I Put It Down Into Words?

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, everyone! Hope you're all doing amazing!
> 
> Here I am, once again, with a Grindeldore piece! I've been reading all the works you guys have been posting like a maniac; thank you so much for brightening my days! :D
> 
> I am still not a native English speaker (nor ever will I be), so I apologise for all and any mistakes you come across with! This hasn't been proofread/beta'd and I am posting this right after writing it (otherwise, I would end up not doing it). So, feel free to correct anything you spot! :)
> 
> I am also aware that the Hogwarts' Pensieve is/was used by the Headmasters and Headmistresses, so Dumbledore wouldn't have access to it during the time this piece is set in. Here, however, he owns it, God knows why! But, since this is a work of fiction, please bear with me ahahah  
> I also have no idea how J.K. Rowling describes the way memories look in her books (it's been ages since I have read them!), so I pretty much made it up!
> 
> Now that all that is settled, please enjoy! :D

 

 

**_“_ ** **_How can I put it down into words when it’s almost too much for my soul alone?”_ **

**_\- Hurts Like Hell by Fleurie_ **

 

 

The marble floor no longer felt ice cold to the touch – time had that effect, and so had learning. He used to think there wasn’t a thing in this world that he could not learn, with more or less effort. However, over the years, he had proven himself to be very wrong.

Albus Dumbledore had learned to love one Gellert Grindelwald, but, as hard as he tried, he could not learn to _hate_ him. He couldn’t even learn to fall out of love with him.

No matter how many times he kept reminding himself of everything his ex-lover had done, to him and to his family, his mismatched eyes were still the only ones that came up in the Mirror. Leaning against the cornerstone behind him, Albus closed his eyes, wanting a break from it all. He had pondered getting rid of the Mirror of Erised, but he simply couldn’t. Sometimes one’s will was not enough. Complete darkness was his place of election these days, as it was only there that he could pretend that his deepest desire was to have his little sister alive again, instead of being with her killer. Well, potential killer, since he was still not sure whose spell had turned out to be fatal on that tragic night.

A single tear slid down Dumbledore’s face, as guilt consumed him to his core, and he looked once again to his reflection, accompanied by Gellert’s very own. Usually, he would see Grindelwald’s teenage version smirking back at him, as if mocking him for his pitiful state. But, today, what he knew to be Gellert’s current appearance through the papers was there instead. He looked older; after all, almost 30 years had passed since he had last seen him. Tiredness seemed to emanate from his eyes, which he had stopped trying to conceal after their summer together. But his essence, the very thing that attracted Albus to Gellert that very first day was still there, hidden behind a mask of certainty, charm and power, designed to seduce others to his cause.

“You know, that haircut does not suit you,” he said, using the back of his hand to clean the trail his tear had left down his right cheek.

Gellert’s reflection kept staring at him, quietly.

_You should come and fix it then, mein Liebling._

He could hear the blonde’s voice in his head, as clearly as if he was standing right next to him. With a sad smile, he started to get up, feeling the years on his back. “I should not,” he firmly said. Picking up the dark blue sheet he used to cover the mirror from prying eyes, he did just that. “But I want to.” He finished, with a sigh.

The walk back to his chambers was always hard, as he had to keep himself from going back to that mirror. He knew that, if given a chance, he would waste away in that room and no one would care. Not really.

Unlocking the door, the first thing he noticed was a small glass vial on top of his pillow, with a thick silver liquid dancing inside. Next to it, stood an envelope addressed to him. His heart skipped a beat when he recognised the handwriting.

Closing the door behind him (with a locking charm for good measure), he nearly ran to pick up the envelope. Taking a deep breath, he opened it to reveal a small note.

 

_This will say what I could not._

_G.G._

It was short and straight to the point, which made Albus ever more curious to find out what exactly Gellert wanted to show him. But, he was also apprehensive. All those years, Grindelwald had never tried to contact him in any way and now, he gets a vial with one of his memories? It could very well be a trap. He did not, however, find it in himself to care. He longed for the time when their minds were as one, when they shared their deepest thoughts and emotions with each other. He had never had and would most certainly never have that with anyone again.

Carefully picking up the vial, he opened it and slowly dropped its contents inside the Pensieve, as if he were handling precious cargo.

Steading himself, he took a deep breath and lowered his head, sinking his face in the silvery liquid.

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> If you've reached this far, thank you so much for reading it! 
> 
> I was planning for this to be a one-shot, but it kind of went into a whole different direction. I'm sorry for the cliffhanger-ish ending, I will try to post the next part soon! I'm still not sure how many of those there will be.
> 
> Also, while reading this, I noticed how sometimes the commas sound weird? I don't know, I think I'm used to writing them like that in my language, so now they come out in my head like that. Hope it isn't too annoying!
> 
> Anyway, thanks and feel free to comment, I'd be thrilled to hear from you!!!


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